View Full Version : Guys Help ...Whats your take on ...
The Dismantler
15-06-2011, 12:37 PM
....going out with somebody who's had an abortion?
I know everyone has got a past; but when I sat down one day with this girl im seeing just chatting --over a few drinks- last weekend, talking about her past relationship history she disclosed to me that three years ago, she fell pregnant and had abortion.. at two months into her pregnancy!
I mean, that just shook me so bad, i dont know whether i want to see her again, I mean, I'd rather be dating her now as a single mother rather than someone who killed a baby ...but am i over-reacting? The kid could have been two and half y.o. now, Geezus, this is hard for me to take..What do you think of people who've had arbotions in the past? First time i met someone who's had an arbotion, so forgive me if i sound a little weak!
Word on the street is your mum wanted an abortion but she was too far along. Son.
Nozza!
15-06-2011, 01:05 PM
Oi, numnuts, you're overreacting...if you don't pass the gynaecological conversation test that all women have with potential long term partners you'll be kicked to the kerb quicker than Bruce Forsyth changed his business cards...
Nozza!
15-06-2011, 01:07 PM
Word on the street is your mum wanted an abortion but she was too far along. Son.
Oi, mush, as you're in the know is it true that his is the only recorded case of the gypsies returning a baby to it's mother?...
Meh, so she'll do bareback then, get her tested for STDs then bang her brains out.
Alan B'stard
15-06-2011, 01:21 PM
Who gives a shit. What I want to know is why you didn't focus on whether she supports Sp*rs?
Who gives a shit. What I want to know is why you didn't focus on whether she supports Sp*rs?
Gareth Bale was aborted.
Nozza!
15-06-2011, 01:28 PM
Oi, mush, don't know about aborted but with those big old ears of his I don't reckon there was too much stirring up of the gene pool...
Coney
15-06-2011, 01:49 PM
....going out with somebody who's had an abortion?
I know everyone has got a past; but when I sat down one day with this girl im seeing just chatting --over a few drinks- last weekend, talking about her past relationship history she disclosed to me that three years ago, she fell pregnant and had abortion.. at two months into her pregnancy!
I mean, that just shook me so bad, i dont know whether i want to see her again, I mean, I'd rather be dating her now as a single mother rather than someone who killed a baby ...but am i over-reacting? The kid could have been two and half y.o. now, Geezus, this is hard for me to take..What do you think of people who've had arbotions in the past? First time i met someone who's had an arbotion, so forgive me if i sound a little weak!
Yes you are over-reacting. Yes, you do sound a little weak. It is questionable why someone would call a 2-month growth a baby - it is no more viable independantly at that age than it was before the egg was fertilised.
I have known women who have had abortions and it never put me off them then.
Maybe try and find out why she took that route and listen sympathetically. An abortion is not a nice process and if she took that road, there is probably a good reason. You have not mentioned anything about that at all - just the bare fact of the abortion. Try looking at the human angle.
Nozza!
15-06-2011, 01:53 PM
Maybe try and find out why she took that route and listen sympathetically. .
Oi, mush, you forgot to add then jump dem bones...
Coney
15-06-2011, 01:57 PM
Oi, mush, you forgot to add then jump dem bones...
I thought that, as a bloke, that went without saying.
Or should I have said "No shit, Sherlock"? ;)
Nothing wrong with abortion. Woman's body, woman's choice.
Alan B'stard
15-06-2011, 02:05 PM
"Dear Deirdre,
I have been having an affair with my brother's wife and had to sling her some cash for an abortion when I got her up the duff.
Should I get a superinjunction?
Bryan Riggs,
Salford"
Nozza!
15-06-2011, 02:07 PM
Oi, geezer, but he's clearly one of those confused metrosexuals that care more about hair gel than treating ladies to fine wine and Belgian chocolates...
Master Splinter
15-06-2011, 02:09 PM
"Dear Deirdre,
I have been having an afffair with my brother's wife and had to sling her some cash for an abortion when I got her up the duff.
Should I get a superinjunction?
Brian Riggs,
Salford"
http://www.facebook.com/people/Brian-Riggs/1080782224
He doesn't even try to hide it!
Coney
15-06-2011, 02:09 PM
Oi, geezer, but he's clearly one of those confused metrosexuals that care more about hair gel than treating ladies to fine wine and Belgian chocolates...
Exactly. A shag is a shag.
Alan B'stard
15-06-2011, 02:13 PM
Oi, geezer, but he's clearly one of those confused metrosexuals that care more about hair gel than treating ladies to fine wine and Belgian chocolates...
Harsh. He might be a religious nutjob who is even more conflicted about his lady's take on foetal rights than he is about taking her up the dirtbox outside of wedlock.
Toronto Gooner
15-06-2011, 02:51 PM
....going out with somebody who's had an abortion?
I know everyone has got a past; but when I sat down one day with this girl im seeing just chatting --over a few drinks- last weekend, talking about her past relationship history she disclosed to me that three years ago, she fell pregnant and had abortion.. at two months into her pregnancy!
I mean, that just shook me so bad, i dont know whether i want to see her again, I mean, I'd rather be dating her now as a single mother rather than someone who killed a baby ...but am i over-reacting? The kid could have been two and half y.o. now, Geezus, this is hard for me to take..What do you think of people who've had arbotions in the past? First time i met someone who's had an arbotion, so forgive me if i sound a little weak!
Based on what you have given, my response would be you have over reacted. But that is based on my experience, opinion, etc. The problem is that you do not give enough information to give a really informed opinion.
For example, how long have you been seeing her? Is this a casual thing or something that could be longer lasting?
Then there is the reason behind the abortion. I know a friend of the family (a Roman Catholic, no less) who had an abortion in her third month because both of her children came down with Rubella. Would you stop a woman from having an abortion in that circumstance?
Or did she have the abortion because she had broken up with father? [Not certain that she would tell you that but you should be able to make a guess based on her comments.]
Having given two reasons for an abortion (admittedly both are extremes), I stand by my belief that it is an over reaction to not see her again.
Is she tight?
Like throwing a stick down the Dartford tunnel if the local toilet walls are to be believed, M'lud.
Like throwing a stick down the Dartford tunnel if the local toilet walls are to be believed, M'lud.
Ah. Disabled parking bay at the gym eh?
Coney
15-06-2011, 03:21 PM
Is she tight?
Not since they took the sprog out.
Too soon? :unsure:
Letters
15-06-2011, 03:39 PM
Nothing wrong with abortion. Woman's body, woman's choice.
Yeah. Right on, man. Let's all be politically correct.
Bloody hippy <_<
V-Pig
15-06-2011, 03:47 PM
I had a friend who got a girl pregnant and she had an abortion. Then, a few years later, she spread around that he'd raped her and made her abort it. Nice girl.
Master Splinter
15-06-2011, 04:16 PM
I had a friend who got a girl pregnant and she had an abortion. Then, a few years later, she spread around that he'd raped her and made her abort it. Nice girl.
Do you live in Eastenders?
V-Pig
15-06-2011, 04:52 PM
No, I just have some tolerant friends who hang out with East Worthing scum. And also sometimes they pretend to be a bit scummy themselves. But they're not really.
Coney
15-06-2011, 04:57 PM
No, I just have some tolerant friends who hang out with East Worthing scum. And also sometimes they pretend to be a bit scummy themselves. But they're not really.
So,,, Eastworthers, then?
V-Pig
15-06-2011, 04:59 PM
:geek: Precisely.
Yeah. Right on, man. Let's all be politically correct.
Bloody hippy <_<You disagree?
The Dismantler
15-06-2011, 06:13 PM
Yes you are over-reacting. Yes, you do sound a little weak. It is questionable why someone would call a 2-month growth a baby - it is no more viable independantly at that age than it was before the egg was fertilised.
I have known women who have had abortions and it never put me off them then.
Maybe try and find out why she took that route and listen sympathetically. An abortion is not a nice process and if she took that road, there is probably a good reason. You have not mentioned anything about that at all - just the bare fact of the abortion. Try looking at the human angle.
================================================== ========================================
Based on what you have given, my response would be you have over reacted. But that is based on my experience, opinion, etc. The problem is that you do not give enough information to give a really informed opinion.
For example, how long have you been seeing her? Is this a casual thing or something that could be longer lasting?
Then there is the reason behind the abortion. I know a friend of the family (a Roman Catholic, no less) who had an abortion in her third month because both of her children came down with Rubella. Would you stop a woman from having an abortion in that circumstance?
Or did she have the abortion because she had broken up with father? [Not certain that she would tell you that but you should be able to make a guess based on her comments.]
Having given two reasons for an abortion (admittedly both are extremes), I stand by my belief that it is an over reaction to not see her again.
To both of you Sir's, thank you for your "mature" replies [the rest of you trollers can keep trolling - ignore button here i come]
OK, just to add a little bit of background info:- the reason why she aborted aint because she had some nasty illness like Rubella, or some sh#t like that, this is her story:
she was going out with this loser of a bloke [so tempeted to mention his name on here & facebook link, but hey ho fk it] who was married at the time they started shagging, but according to her, he wasnt happy in his marriage, they were about to divorce, sleeping in different rooms, arguing all the time, y'know the bad marriage kinda of shit basically!.. she (the girl in question) was in her second year at a respectable uni doing rather well though when she found out she were two months late!
well, when that muppet finally got his divorce through, they moved in together; - thats when the trouble started, according to her, he cheated on her not once, not twice, but three times with three different women, and once with his ex-wife...
she booked holidays for both of them, but he was a no show up; she ended up going to away with her mum.
whilst in portugal she had a long and hard discussion with her mother and both agreed this lad would be a bum of a father to the kid/ foetus/ embryo she was carrying - so termination was the only way out, which she did.... but Mr Muppet didnt want her to get rid of his baby, so they split up after that...
since then (early 2008) she hasnt been out with anyone, till she met me at work (feb. 2011), some of you remember my quick fling (http://www.goonersweb.co.uk/forum/showthread.php?t=66) with her in my earlier thread...
I really like this girl, but this arbotion story........
Coney
15-06-2011, 06:18 PM
Sounds like she was a bit naive and got taken for a ride by a complete shit - her mistake was inexperience of life rather than anything bad. If I was in your shoes, I would ignore that history and if I liked her, start going out with her and see where it leads. If you think it is always going to worry you, then stop now. Simples.
Toronto Gooner
16-06-2011, 12:11 AM
Sounds like she was a bit naive and got taken for a ride by a complete shit - her mistake was inexperience of life rather than anything bad. If I was in your shoes, I would ignore that history and if I liked her, start going out with her and see where it leads. If you think it is always going to worry you, then stop now. Simples.
I agree with this assessment. It seems that she was naive and paid the price. She has learnt a very harsh lesson regarding the trustworthiness of some men. I do not know how "strong" your relationship is or how strong you want it to become. However, if you want to keep seeing her and think that this relationship has legs, then you have to come to terms with this situation.
I would add that I see one aspect you have not mentioned: how does she feel about what happened? I am not certain if you know or have asked, but perhaps she is profoundly unhappy about the choice she had to make. Her telling you, regardless of the circumstances, could have been an opening gambit to find out how you feel and to allow the two of you to discuss things. Perhaps she is hoping to hear you tell her that you understand the difficulty of the decision she made, and that if she wants to talk about how she feels, you will listen.
My only other comment is that this woman is far more than an abortion, and you have to consider the whole person.
Alan B'stard
16-06-2011, 06:26 AM
She must talk really fast to get all that out in 1 minute's speed dating.
Nozza!
16-06-2011, 07:37 AM
Oi, mush, I think you need to take a long hard look at yourself...you're the one with the issues not her...so if you are not comfortable with her past let her down gently and jog on...the last thing this lady needs is some arsehole being judgemental about her choices...so either deal with your immaturity or find someone who hasn't been in an difficult situation...she'll be in aisle 13 between the pixie dust and the unicorn and kidney pies...
Oi, mush, I think you need to take a long hard look at yourself...you're the one with the issues not her...so if you are not comfortable with her past let her down gently and jog on...the last thing this lady needs is some arsehole being judgemental about her choices...so either deal with your immaturity or find someone who hasn't been in an difficult situation...she'll be in aisle 13 between the pixie dust and the unicorn and kidney pies...
You're kidding! That's where my Dad found my Mum!
Oi, mush, I think you need to take a long hard look at yourself...you're the one with the issues not her...so if you are not comfortable with her past let her down gently and jog on...the last thing this lady needs is some arsehole being judgemental about her choices...so either deal with your immaturity or find someone who hasn't been in an difficult situation...she'll be in aisle 13 between the pixie dust and the unicorn and kidney pies...
This :good:
Coney
16-06-2011, 09:19 AM
This :good:
Good call.
Letters
16-06-2011, 11:30 PM
You disagree?
Not totally anti but I don't think it should be just used as another form of contraception and while it is the woman's body there is also a potential life to consider.
There's a difference IMO between a clump of cells and a more viable foetus and it's hard to know where the line is but past a certain point there are surely more complicated issues to consider than "well, it's her body, she can do what she likes".
Not totally anti but I don't think it should be just used as another form of contraception and while it is the woman's body there is also a potential life to consider.
There's a difference IMO between a clump of cells and a more viable foetus and it's hard to know where the line is but past a certain point there are surely more complicated issues to consider than "well, it's her body, she can do what she likes".I don't disagree with any of that, but once it's got to the time where it is more complicated than that, abortion is illegal anyway.
Flavs
17-06-2011, 11:45 AM
Word on the street is your mum wanted an abortion but she was too far along. Son.
:haha:
Syn :bow:
Flavs
17-06-2011, 11:50 AM
Not totally anti but I don't think it should be just used as another form of contraception and while it is the woman's body there is also a potential life to consider.
There's a difference IMO between a clump of cells and a more viable foetus and it's hard to know where the line is but past a certain point there are surely more complicated issues to consider than "well, it's her body, she can do what she likes".
Come on sing with me.."You're just a bootleg Catholic, a bootleg CAAAAAAAATholic"
Injury Time
17-06-2011, 12:10 PM
....going out with somebody who's had an abortion?
I know everyone has got a past; but when I sat down one day with this girl im seeing just chatting --over a few drinks- last weekend, talking about her past relationship history she disclosed to me that three years ago, she fell pregnant and had abortion.. at two months into her pregnancy!
I mean, that just shook me so bad, i dont know whether i want to see her again, I mean, I'd rather be dating her now as a single mother rather than someone who killed a baby ...but am i over-reacting? The kid could have been two and half y.o. now, Geezus, this is hard for me to take..What do you think of people who've had arbotions in the past? First time i met someone who's had an arbotion, so forgive me if i sound a little weak!
You probably need Bobs help...
http://i251.photobucket.com/albums/gg288/novocainekarma/321711271.jpg
Fish Finger Sandwich
18-06-2011, 12:52 PM
Is she tight?
Oh yeah. Skank never once bought me a pint.
Seriously, after reading the story I think she deserves credit for her honesty. There was no reason why she should tell you about it. I reckon she must be keen, Give some respec.
The Wengerbabies
19-06-2011, 11:24 AM
She's a murderer plain and simple.
Do the honorable thing and kill her, she deserves it.
Arsenal Fan
19-06-2011, 11:32 AM
i'd be happy, coz then i knew if i accidentally got her up the duff, she would abort it. :)
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