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Coney
10-06-2011, 12:32 PM
Do you mind popping around to mine after a la nude and doing some polishing and scrubbing ta

Seeya later

If he won't, I will. :)

MissHandbag
10-06-2011, 01:08 PM
If he won't, I will. :)

You Tarzan, me Jayne - get scrubbing

Coney
10-06-2011, 03:06 PM
You Tarzan, me Jayne - get scrubbing

Get a la nude and I'll give it a polish too.

Japan Shaking All Over
10-06-2011, 04:30 PM
karate kid style.......wax on, wax off

Letters
11-06-2011, 10:49 AM
karate kid style.......wax on, whacks off

Just corrected that typo for you

LDG
11-06-2011, 11:01 AM
Cock and bollocks.

Why did I agree to doing something normal today with no drinking involved. Sucks. Lovely and sunny out too. Beer garden tastic.

Gutted.

cricketsi
11-06-2011, 11:59 AM
I knocked a glass of apple juice onto my keyboard the other day and am having to type like my mum and whack the keys really hard because half of them are sticking. I'll have to disassemble and clean the keyboard, something I haven't done since procrastinating to avoid revising at uni.

The Wengerbabies
11-06-2011, 01:02 PM
I knocked a glass of apple juice onto my keyboard the other day and am having to type like my mum and whack the keys really hard because half of them are sticking. I'll have to disassemble and clean the keyboard, something I haven't done since procrastinating to avoid revising at uni.
Yeah, the apple juice is why they're sticky :coffee:

Cripps_orig
11-06-2011, 05:18 PM
Just woke up

Got a headache.

Might sleep again

Marc Overmars
11-06-2011, 05:42 PM
So some kids thought it would be a clever to play cricket on the pavement and they've only gone and left a fucking crack in our window. Cunts.

GP
11-06-2011, 05:50 PM
So some kids thought it would be a clever to play cricket on the pavement and they've only gone and left a fucking crack in our window. Cunts.

Asians :rolleyes:

V-Pig
12-06-2011, 11:38 AM
A good friend of mine has been going out with milfette, contrary to all logic and sense. She's cheated on him a few times, fucked the smackhead father-of-her-child (presumably without protection) a few times, and generally treated him like shit because she's a filthy skank. I got a drunken phone-call last night from him calling her the love of his life. Then he climbed into her flat 3 stories up. But she wasn't there because she was fucking someone else who'd been at the party.

Sigh.

Cripps_orig
12-06-2011, 11:40 AM
Going football today in the rain :dance:

Was brilliant last week

Sun :pal:

PGFC
13-06-2011, 07:18 AM
Morning :tiphat:

Monday again, already :(

Had a surprise yesterday, during my echocardiogram it was discovered that, contrary to popular belief, I do have a heart.

Injury Time
13-06-2011, 08:13 AM
Morning :tiphat:

Monday again, already :(

Had a surprise yesterday, during my echocardiogram it was discovered that, contrary to popular belief, I do have a heart.

ECG output or GTFO tbh :sulk:

Monday blues/ shit weather combo <_<

Marc Overmars
13-06-2011, 08:36 AM
Monday and grey, is there a worse combo?

Shouldn't complain though really, the weather now is just being back dated from Apr/May when we had all the sun.

Letters
13-06-2011, 09:13 AM
Morning :tiphat:

Monday again, already :(

Had a surprise yesterday, during my echocardiogram it was discovered that, contrary to popular belief, I do have a heart.

49

O RLY?

Morning all :tiphat:

Monday :(

But 3 day week :)

Coney
13-06-2011, 09:37 AM
Monday and grey, is there a worse combo?


There's a dropdown menu at the bottom to change the colour scheme.

Injury Time
13-06-2011, 09:41 AM
Monday and grey, is there a worse combo?


There's a dropdown menu at the bottom to change the colour scheme.
:rimshot: he's back ;)

Marc Overmars
13-06-2011, 09:43 AM
The force of GW was too strong for Coney to resist.

MissHandbag
13-06-2011, 09:57 AM
49

O RLY?

Morning all :tiphat:

Monday :(

But 3 day week :)

Is the world gonna end again on Wednesday night?

Letters
13-06-2011, 10:06 AM
I hope not. If it does I'll miss Elton John on Thursday.
He's rocking the Isle of Man ( :lol: ) so I'm going over for that and to see mum for a few days.

Coney
13-06-2011, 10:06 AM
The force of GW was too strong for Coney to resist.

No - I just felt it was 2% short and needed some experience in the midfield to bring it to the top.

V-Pig
13-06-2011, 10:08 AM
Wtf? You actually were tarzan?

Marc Overmars
13-06-2011, 10:09 AM
The picture of the cone in that thread gave it away didn't it? :lol:

MissHandbag
13-06-2011, 10:09 AM
I hope not. If it does I'll miss Elton John on Thursday.
He's rocking the Isle of Man ( :lol: ) so I'm going over for that and to see mum for a few days.

Sounds fun - I wouldn't mind seeing him

V-Pig
13-06-2011, 10:10 AM
The picture of the cone in that thread gave it away didn't it? :lol:

Well yeah, but I wasn't sure from his posts whether it could be him. Also, tarzan didn't have a capital letter.

Also, I don't trust him.

IBK
13-06-2011, 10:10 AM
A good friend of mine has been going out with milfette, contrary to all logic and sense. She's cheated on him a few times, fucked the smackhead father-of-her-child (presumably without protection) a few times, and generally treated him like shit because she's a filthy skank. I got a drunken phone-call last night from him calling her the love of his life. Then he climbed into her flat 3 stories up. But she wasn't there because she was fucking someone else who'd been at the party.

Sigh.

The Ginger?

V-Pig
13-06-2011, 10:13 AM
The Ginger?

Nah, he's her friend. He "knows her" but wants to help her and thinks she has many (presumably hidden) good qualities.

My other friend is the one who "loves her".

And they're both fucking insane.

IBK
13-06-2011, 10:16 AM
Nah, he's her friend. He "knows her" but wants to help her and thinks she has many (presumably hidden) good qualities.

My other friend is the one who "loves her".

And they're both fucking insane.

Most girls who fuck around have self-worth issues...I reckon your friend must do too.

Injury Time
13-06-2011, 10:17 AM
Nah, he's her friend. He "knows her" but wants to help her and thinks she has many (presumably hidden) good qualities.

My other friend is the one who "loves her".

And they're both fucking insane.
Insane is an unusual name for a lady, apt but unusual...

Coney
13-06-2011, 10:21 AM
Wtf? You actually were tarzan?

Yes, but the wrong Jane offered the chance for nude polishing. :(

IBK
13-06-2011, 10:23 AM
Insane is an unusual name for a lady, apt but unusual...

A 'lady' may be a bit of a misnomer?

V-Pig
13-06-2011, 10:24 AM
Most girls who fuck around have self-worth issues...I reckon your friend must do too.

That's true enough, I reckon. Poor guy. He was so drunk too. Really embarrassed himself.

V-Pig
13-06-2011, 10:24 AM
Insane is an unusual name for a lady, apt but unusual...

:rimshot:

IBK
13-06-2011, 10:27 AM
http://www.goonersweb.co.uk/forum/images/misc/quote_icon.png Originally Posted by Japan Shaking All Over http://www.goonersweb.co.uk/forum/images/buttons/viewpost-right.png (http://www.goonersweb.co.uk/forum/showthread.php?p=8004#post8004)
karate kid style.......wax on, whacks off



Just corrected that typo for you

That got a LOL from me!

Coney
13-06-2011, 10:28 AM
Now THIS and the message above are a classic example of why the quoting of multiple messages needs sorting out!



Edit: Except now it is edited to make it a bit clearer, but you had to dick around with it first!

Edit: Edit: And now the quote I thought I had seems to not be there. Must have hit a wrong button. Ah bugger.

IBK
13-06-2011, 10:29 AM
Now THIS and the message above are a classic example of why the quoting of multiple messages needs sorting out!



Edit: Except now it is edited to make it a bit clearer, but you had to dick around with it first!

Seconded!

Coney
13-06-2011, 10:31 AM
Seconded!

Also, the date/time is missing from the quote. Now if we had that, as least (in a larger thread) you would improve the chances of find out what the original quoted message had been referring to.

the easter bunnie
13-06-2011, 10:36 AM
tarzan had a Monkey called cheetah. some monkeys wee on peanuts to get them out of the packet. I like Nobby's nuts.

Letters
13-06-2011, 10:44 AM
Sounds fun - I wouldn't mind seeing him

Seen him 3 times previously.
Twice brilliant, once so-so (did too many tracks I didn't know the middle time, the other two was all his hits and fantastic).
First time was just him and a piano in Hyde Park. No backing singers or orchestra. He just came on and did all the hits on his own. Was absolutely brilliant.

Coney
13-06-2011, 10:45 AM
some monkeys wee on peanuts to get them out of the packet.

pistachios?

the easter bunnie
13-06-2011, 11:20 AM
No peanuts because they grow in the jungle where monkeys live. Pistachios come from Italy and make ice cream flavouring.

Coney
13-06-2011, 11:34 AM
No peanuts because they grow in the jungle where monkeys live. Pistachios come from Italy and make ice cream flavouring.

:tumbleweed:

PGFC
13-06-2011, 11:41 AM
I was going to but... :shrug:

Olivier's xmas twist
13-06-2011, 11:47 AM
Umm. Bit more specific? The date where? On here?

yep

MissHandbag
13-06-2011, 11:50 AM
tarzan had a Monkey called cheetah. some monkeys wee on peanuts to get them out of the packet. I like Nobby's nuts.

I use that method myself

the easter bunnie
13-06-2011, 11:52 AM
:tumbleweed:

Do you like Plum Jam. Monkeys don't that's why they haven't joined my Plum Jam Circle. You can get PBJ sandwiches in a can in America.

the easter bunnie
13-06-2011, 11:55 AM
I use that method myself

it was boy monkeys that done that. is you name Kay. they would be KP nuts then.

MissHandbag
13-06-2011, 12:04 PM
it was boy monkeys that done that. is you name Kay. they would be KP nuts then.

My name's actually Junglefresh

the easter bunnie
13-06-2011, 12:08 PM
My name's actually Junglefresh

you mummy and daddy were very silly weren't they.

MissHandbag
13-06-2011, 12:19 PM
you mummy and daddy were very silly weren't they.

They are not were

PGFC
13-06-2011, 03:14 PM
Warm now :cool:

Letters
13-06-2011, 03:17 PM
Went downstairs for our afternoon tea break (Public Sector :bow:) and we were sat there when a colleague said "look!" and pointed. So I looked and couldn't see anything. Then I saw what he was pointing at - there's a mouse scurrying around down there! Quite sweet but not the best thing to see in the canteen.

:doh:

Marc Overmars
13-06-2011, 03:20 PM
Went downstairs for our afternoon tea break (Public Sector :bow:) and we were sat there when a colleague said "look!" and pointed. So I looked and couldn't see anything. Then I saw what he was pointing at - there's a mouse scurrying around down there! Quite sweet but not the best thing to see in the canteen.

:doh:

You should threaten to report them to Heath & Safety unless they give you a pay rise.

Injury Time
13-06-2011, 03:24 PM
You should threaten to report them to Heath & Safety unless they give you a pay rise.
Might want to try infection control, H&S will just tell you to do a COSHH/risk assessment on the mouse in its' working environment :good:

Injury Time
13-06-2011, 03:26 PM
Public Sector :yikes: there's a mouse scurrying around the canteen.

:doh:

pfft tell you work in posh PS :sulk:

Letters
13-06-2011, 03:31 PM
pfft tell you work in posh PS :sulk:

:lol: Oh yeah, none of your lowly cockroaches. We get mice :cool:

We told the bloke. He'll probably do...something. Maybe.

Chrissie
13-06-2011, 03:59 PM
:lol: Oh yeah, none of your lowly cockroaches. We get mice :cool:

We told the bloke. He'll probably do...something. Maybe.

I would have been on the first tube home. I have a mice phobia.

Coney
13-06-2011, 04:01 PM
I would have been on the first tube home. I have a mice phobia.

Do you realise how many mice (and rats) live in the tube system?

Letters
13-06-2011, 04:03 PM
I would have been on the first tube home. I have a mice phobia.

The elephant downstairs wasn't happy either.

Marc Overmars
13-06-2011, 04:03 PM
Ah so that's what those untimely bumps are, mice getting run over.

Cripps_orig
13-06-2011, 04:05 PM
Shit weathers back :(

Chrissie
13-06-2011, 04:07 PM
The elephant downstairs wasn't happy either.

I have a reason.

Marc Overmars
13-06-2011, 04:08 PM
So I was ridiculed for buying a new jacket today, a winter style one. No one could seem to grasp that it was an investment. I'd rather pay the heavily discounted price now than wait until it's in season and pay loads. tbf imho tbh

Coney
13-06-2011, 04:09 PM
The elephant downstairs wasn't happy either.

So the mouse is the elephant in the room? :unsure:

Xhaka Can’t
13-06-2011, 04:11 PM
Do you realise how many mice (and rats) live in the tube system?
Are you including or excluding the drivers?

Xhaka Can’t
13-06-2011, 04:12 PM
So I was ridiculed for buying a new jacket today, a winter style one. No one could seem to grasp that it was an investment. I'd rather pay the heavily discounted price now than wait until it's in season and pay loads. tbf imho tbh

Fuck 'em, they are retards.

Injury Time
13-06-2011, 04:28 PM
Fuck 'em, they are retards.
Pretty sure fucking retards is frowned upon...

Xhaka Can’t
13-06-2011, 04:59 PM
Pretty sure fucking retards is frowned upon...

Apparently they are the horniest people you'll ever come across.

Pun intended.

Ollie the Optimist
13-06-2011, 09:45 PM
anyone know how to sync an htc to a mac?

Letters
13-06-2011, 09:48 PM
no.


hth
:tiphat:

the easter bunnie
14-06-2011, 07:21 AM
anyone know how to sync an htc to a mac?

You should always take your mac with you if if looks like rain. I have a Kagoul though they keep you dry. Except for your face and legs, unless you have waterproof trousers. I like the Human League - they are a good sync band. Together in Electric dreams is their best song. It comes from a film about computers taking over the world.

Letters
14-06-2011, 07:39 AM
Sunny! :cool:

Morning all. :tiphat:

Injury Time
14-06-2011, 07:43 AM
Sunny! :cool:

Morning all. :tiphat:

'sup :tiphat:

Letters
14-06-2011, 07:50 AM
My cholesterol level. Mmm, cake.

:dance:

Ow, my chest. :(

Injury Time
14-06-2011, 07:56 AM
My cholesterol level. Mmm, cake.

:dance:

Ow, my chest. :(
Meh chest smest wait until it shoots down your arm and the nausea hits, then back off 1 slice :good:

Syn
14-06-2011, 08:35 AM
Oooooh Sun. Pollen. Fucking yay. Sneezing, itchy eyes. I bloody love hayfever.

Marc Overmars
14-06-2011, 08:36 AM
Pretty much. :(

Coney
14-06-2011, 08:50 AM
anyone know how to sync an htc to a mac?

rtfm

LDG
14-06-2011, 09:04 AM
Marrrrnin.

Coffee coffee coffee.

PGFC
14-06-2011, 09:17 AM
Oi! oi! oi!!

:tiphat:

Coney
14-06-2011, 09:24 AM
I'm having coffee with a ginga biscuit.

LDG
14-06-2011, 10:00 AM
Pezza :tiphat:

Can't wake up proper this morning. Like yesterday. Such a deep sleep both nights. May be an old cunt tonight and hit the sack at 10.30.

Coney
14-06-2011, 11:56 AM
Was it just me that couldn't get into GW for an hour just now?

PGFC
14-06-2011, 12:00 PM
Was it just me that couldn't get into GW for an hour just now?

I couldn't.


then again, I was walking round town so it's not altogether surprising :whistle:

:run:

Injury Time
14-06-2011, 12:54 PM
Was it just me that couldn't get into GW for an hour just now?

Me too :coffee:

Letters
14-06-2011, 01:44 PM
Me too :coffee:

Jofnn! :threaten:

LDG
14-06-2011, 02:01 PM
Jofnn! :threaten:

I heard he spent 10p on sweets rather than feeding the meter :sulk:

WMUG
14-06-2011, 07:41 PM
Just spent the last 4 hours playing football. Absolutely knackered.

Chrissie
14-06-2011, 07:45 PM
I had a bonfire tonight of paperwork with my details on. Pissed off the neighbours but am I bovverred!

Letters
15-06-2011, 07:56 AM
You should get a shredder.

Morning all.
Friday!
Sort of.
:dance:

PGFC
15-06-2011, 08:23 AM
Morning :tiphat:

LDG
15-06-2011, 08:27 AM
Well hellodare.

Thursday :dance:

Marc Overmars
15-06-2011, 08:32 AM
Piss off. It's Weds:banghead:

LDG
15-06-2011, 08:36 AM
:haha:

This will be the tenth week in a row I haven't worked a full week.

Wednesday's do suck though.

LDG
15-06-2011, 09:48 AM
You know when you have one brewing, and you keep forgetting to go???

LDG
15-06-2011, 10:21 AM
Have gone. Ahhhh.

Starting to rain.

Also. :tumbleweed:

Alan B'stard
15-06-2011, 11:09 AM
second child due in about three months

Letters
15-06-2011, 11:10 AM
Some of us have to work you know <_<

Letters
15-06-2011, 11:10 AM
second child due in about three months

Congrats.

Er...
Who are you? :unsure:

LDG
15-06-2011, 11:12 AM
Congrats.

Er...
Who are you? :unsure:

Pretty sure he was Nayan on old GW....though I may be wrong.

Nayan and the legendary toilet seat :bow:

Alan B'stard
15-06-2011, 11:53 AM
heh cant deny it.

Japan Shaking All Over
15-06-2011, 01:58 PM
second child due in about three months

Congratulations

my first due in October,
wonder who we got that month?

Master Splinter
15-06-2011, 02:03 PM
my first due in October,
wonder who we got that month?
Birmingham in the Europa League.

Japan Shaking All Over
15-06-2011, 02:42 PM
there we have it the my kids name will be.....

Mingham

PGFC
15-06-2011, 02:46 PM
there we have it the my kids name will be.....

Mingham


Good job it's not Scunthorpe in the CC then :good:

LDG
15-06-2011, 03:11 PM
Good job it's not Scunthorpe in the CC then :good:

Tell that to Utd's ji-sung :sulk:

Japan Shaking All Over
15-06-2011, 04:30 PM
Good job it's not Scunthorpe in the CC then :good:

ouch

hymppi
15-06-2011, 05:39 PM
Good job it's not Scunthorpe in the CC then :good:

:clap:

Injury Time
15-06-2011, 06:32 PM
second child due in about three months
All I can advise is go to bed now, sleep until it arrives :sleep:

Master Splinter
15-06-2011, 07:02 PM
All I can advise is go to bed now, sleep until it arrives :sleep:
:gp:

Takes much more of a toll on men tbh.

Alan B'stard
15-06-2011, 07:56 PM
All I can advise is go to bed now, sleep until it arrives :sleep:

heh i hear that a lot

Injury Time
15-06-2011, 08:41 PM
heh i hear that a lot

Twice the fun, three times the work ;)

LDG
16-06-2011, 08:44 AM
Marn :tiphat:

My legs ache like fuck. Done 27k worth of running this week. Getting to old for this shit.

PGFC
16-06-2011, 08:55 AM
Morning all :tiphat:

Drizzle, when I find out who was responsible for issuing that drought warning last week I'm going to drown them in a fucking puddle.

Cripps_orig
16-06-2011, 10:21 AM
Great weather :dance:

PGFC
16-06-2011, 03:18 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?gl=US&v=ccjfSyO9ncM

Cripps_orig
16-06-2011, 03:22 PM
Young Ones :bow:

Marc Overmars
16-06-2011, 03:36 PM
So I just picked up my first ever paid-for prescription. £7.40? FFS.

The world is expensive.

Coney
16-06-2011, 03:45 PM
So I just picked up my first ever paid-for prescription. £7.40? FFS.

The world is expensive.

Welcome to Thatcher's Britain. ;)

LDG
16-06-2011, 04:06 PM
25 Mins. Then I'm getting on it.

Day off tomoz. Hope to be completely hungover to fuck tomorrow morning....then I can enjoy hair of the dog tomorrow afternoon ##

PGFC
17-06-2011, 06:43 AM
Friday...at last... :patrice:

only 9-odd hours to go

oh

:(

the easter bunnie
17-06-2011, 07:32 AM
i think you means 4 odd hours and five even hours. or possible 5 even hours and 4 odd hours. Unless you go home early because you don't feel well. that would not be good though.

Marc Overmars
17-06-2011, 08:12 AM
It's Friday Friday gotta get down on Friday.

Injury Time
17-06-2011, 10:26 AM
http://i42.photobucket.com/albums/e326/holblujoebel/web%20images/twangtwangtwang.gif

PGFC
17-06-2011, 10:40 AM
She's remarkably calm considering she's got a finger trapped in the door :unsure:

milla
17-06-2011, 10:48 AM
http://i42.photobucket.com/albums/e326/holblujoebel/web%20images/twangtwangtwang.gif

WTF is wrong with her? :coffee:

Injury Time
17-06-2011, 10:52 AM
WTF is wrong with her? :coffee:
she just read the transfers thread?

Coney
17-06-2011, 10:55 AM
WTF is wrong with her? :coffee:

She misunderstood the Rainbow spoof and now likes playing with twangers

Alan B'stard
17-06-2011, 10:58 AM
is this the doris who upset the chap in the other thread by confessing to an abortion?

milla
17-06-2011, 11:08 AM
She misunderstood the Rainbow spoof and now likes playing with twangers


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kclq2zGQy4w

Japan Shaking All Over
18-06-2011, 07:03 AM
came into work to help out on a Saturday......in the rain (rainy season, no not just your average light shower!)

so far every appointment has cancelled.......wonder why?

last time I come to work in the rain

Injury Time
18-06-2011, 07:43 AM
came into work to help out on a Saturday......in the rain (rainy season, no not just your average light shower!)

so far every appointment has cancelled.......wonder why?

last time I come to work in the rain

Not a good day for your Ombrophobia clinic eh? :console:

Alan B'stard
18-06-2011, 06:37 PM
Mrs B'stard is on a girly spa weekend someplace. She just texted saying she and her pal are gatecrashing Footballer 'Joleon Ledbury's' wedding.

On investigation this turns out to be Joleon 'Lt Worf' Lescott. Regular readers of Goonersweb might just remember she is a Red, so cruising for phone pics with sky blues is not high on her to-do list. Still she is under strict directive to get Vieira, assuming he gave enough of a shit to be there.

Letters
18-06-2011, 08:04 PM
Stupid bastard Olympic ticket people :fury:
Had an email saying "Congratulations..." (on the basis that I did at least get some tickets, got less than 10% of what I applied for so I'm not sure I should be congratulated although I know many are in the same boat and lots didn't get any at all).
But then they STILL don't tell me what I've got.
They must know. They took the money. So they must know right now what I got.
JUST SODDING TELL ME YOU UTTER TWATS!


and....breathe. <_<

LDG
18-06-2011, 09:15 PM
OK. Maybe I've been lucky. I have shagged more than fifty women. But less than a hundred.

But, that was a serious clean up job this morning.

Massive gusher.

All over the place.

I used a whole towel to clean my legs. And I don't think my bed has dried off yet :(

Injury Time
18-06-2011, 09:20 PM
OK. Maybe I've been lucky. I have shagged more than fifty women. But less than a hundred.

But, that was a serious clean up job this morning.

Massive gusher.

All over the place.

I used a whole towel to clean my legs. And I don't think my bed has dried off yet :(
Do not pass Go immediately change your login name to Pant Model...ah "The Gusher" still brings a tear to the eye...
:haha:

Marc Overmars
18-06-2011, 09:24 PM
Fuck. :sick:

Reminds me of my first year at Uni, hooked up with a girl and she didn't tell me that she was a virgin.

The morning was not a pretty sight. Those sheets were swiftly disposed of.

LDG
18-06-2011, 09:31 PM
Sick man.

Seriously. Where does that come from.

Injury Time
18-06-2011, 09:42 PM
Sick man.

Seriously. Where does that come from.
http://i577.photobucket.com/albums/ss217/colin91a/Random%20photos/Not-sure-if-serious.jpg

LDG
18-06-2011, 09:56 PM
I meant the gushingness. Not MO's broken hymen.

Injury Time
18-06-2011, 10:07 PM
I meant the gushingness. Not MO's broken hymen.
um yeah I know :blink:

Japan Shaking All Over
19-06-2011, 04:54 PM
off to the hospital bright and early with the wife to see how the baby is getting on

due in October

Japan Shaking All Over
19-06-2011, 04:57 PM
Fuck. :sick:

Reminds me of my first year at Uni, hooked up with a girl and she didn't tell me that she was a virgin.

The morning was not a pretty sight. Those sheets were swiftly disposed of.

ahhh:console: and those Thomas the Tank Engine sheets were your favs too!!!

Coney
19-06-2011, 07:03 PM
ahhh:console: and those Thomas the Tank Engine sheets were your favs too!!!

He's replacing them with John Thomas the engine. :good:

Injury Time
19-06-2011, 07:53 PM
off to the hospital bright and early with the wife to see how the baby is getting on

due in October
Good luck :cheers:

Coney
19-06-2011, 08:33 PM
Do not pass Go immediately change your login name to Pant Model...ah "The Gusher" still brings a tear to the eye...
:haha:

BEST. OLD. GW. THREAD. EVER. :good:

LDG
20-06-2011, 08:22 AM
Good day :tiphat:

Thursday :dance:

Marc Overmars
20-06-2011, 08:25 AM
I wish they could just wipe Mondays off the calendar.

LDG
20-06-2011, 08:35 AM
Was really good on Saturday and went home early, and went to the gym yesterday, so feeling the spritliest I have done on a Monday for a while.

Letters
20-06-2011, 08:36 AM
:(

LDG
20-06-2011, 08:45 AM
:(

Why the long face?

Letters
20-06-2011, 08:49 AM
Why the long face?

It's just the way I walk.

Dunno. Monday. Missing the missus (we didn't see each other at the weekend). Seems like a long way till the weekend.

PGFC
20-06-2011, 08:52 AM
Morning All :tiphat:

:( the boy's off for a weeks adventuring on his school trip.

LDG
20-06-2011, 09:02 AM
Everyone's depressed! Awesome!

I'm not.

:dance:

LDG
20-06-2011, 09:34 AM
Falvs :bow:

Nice one bro.

Letters
20-06-2011, 09:35 AM
:unsure:

MissHandbag
20-06-2011, 10:47 AM
Everyone's depressed! Awesome!

I'm not.

:dance:

Yes

This is my shoulder now:
http://i466.photobucket.com/albums/rr24/Dolly_Hooligan/acj-dislo.jpg

And 3 weeks from today (if I can get my blood pressure down enough for them to operate) - I'll be drilled full of holes and metal and back in a sling for about 2 months.

Plus - I'm in trouble at work

Plus - I'm skint

Plus - Ah fuck it

Flavs
20-06-2011, 10:51 AM
Falvs :bow:

Nice one bro.


we shall wait and see but i dont believe in coincidcences :good:

Letters
20-06-2011, 11:04 AM
we shall wait and see but i dont believe in coincidcences :good:

<_<

Flavs
20-06-2011, 11:06 AM
<_<
what's up with you?

Letters
20-06-2011, 11:11 AM
Are you and LDG shagging again?

PGFC
20-06-2011, 11:12 AM
Yes

This is my shoulder now:
http://i466.photobucket.com/albums/rr24/Dolly_Hooligan/acj-dislo.jpg

And 3 weeks from today (if I can get my blood pressure down enough for them to operate) - I'll be drilled full of holes and metal and back in a sling for about 2 months.

Plus - I'm in trouble at work

Plus - I'm skint

Plus - Ah fuck it


:hug: You have my sympathy for 3 of those and an acceptance for the last ##

Flavs
20-06-2011, 11:17 AM
Are you and LDG shagging again?

What's it to you?

Flavs
20-06-2011, 11:18 AM
Yes


I'll be drilled full of holes


Is it Friday already?

dazthegooner
20-06-2011, 02:43 PM
Well what an eventfull weekend met someone Saturday went back to her place son came back early yesterday didn't like it put a blowtorch to my face then threatened me with a knuckle duster ended up leaving my phone hopefully police will be able to get it back..

PGFC
20-06-2011, 02:47 PM
Well what an eventfull weekend met someone Saturday went back to her place son came back early yesterday didn't like it put a blowtorch to my face then threatened me with a knuckle duster ended up leaving my phone hopefully police will be able to get it back..

Kids :rolleyes:

Flavs
20-06-2011, 02:47 PM
Well what an eventfull weekend met someone Saturday went back to her place son came back early yesterday didn't like it put a blowtorch to my face then threatened me with a knuckle duster ended up leaving my phone hopefully police will be able to get it back..

You are lucky he didnt get the fork out mate.

dazthegooner
20-06-2011, 02:51 PM
Not to sure what to do mates want to go round and kick his head in..

Flavs
20-06-2011, 02:52 PM
Not to sure what to do mates want to go round and kick his head in..

just leave it, not worth the hassle

dazthegooner
20-06-2011, 02:54 PM
just leave it, not worth the hassle

Make you right someone will do it eventually though just won't be because of me.

Master Splinter
20-06-2011, 03:16 PM
Not to sure what to do mates want to go round and kick his head in..
Do it.

Violence Is The Answer.

VITA :bow:

PGFC
20-06-2011, 03:39 PM
Not to sure what to do mates want to go round and kick his head in..

Nah, you should just post pics of his mum on Goonersweb, that'll be sweet.


or GTFO tbh.

dazthegooner
20-06-2011, 03:47 PM
Nah, you should just post pics of his mum on Goonersweb, that'll be sweet.


or GTFO tbh.

Foxtrot Oscar :good: ;)

PGFC
20-06-2011, 04:03 PM
Nah, you should just post pics of his mum on Goonersweb, that'll be sweet.


or GTFO tbh.


Foxtrot Oscar :good: ;)

:haha: Can't blame a bloke for trying

Letters
21-06-2011, 07:58 AM
Longest Day

:patrice:

All downhill from here :cool:

:unsure:

:(

Meh.

Morning all :tiphat:

PGFC
21-06-2011, 08:14 AM
:tiphat:

Marc Overmars
21-06-2011, 08:28 AM
So on my way to work this morning on a crowded tube as usual. I was sitting down and some woman asked if she could sit. She wasn't preggers nor did she have any obvious disability, I said sorry I've still got another 10 mins or so before my stop. Then she sneered and quite blatantly spoke to someone in disgust about a lack of respect these days. I asked if she had something to say to me but she just ignored. Fuck off bint!

LDG
21-06-2011, 08:29 AM
:wave:

Last day in the office for the week.

:beer:

LDG
21-06-2011, 08:30 AM
So on my way to work this morning on a crowded tube as usual. I was sitting down and some woman asked if she could sit. She wasn't preggers nor did she have any obvious disability, I said sorry I've still got another 10 mins or so before my stop. Then she sneered and quite blatantly spoke to someone in disgust about a lack of respect these days. I asked if she had something to say to me but she just ignored. Fuck off bint!

Good lad!

That's my school of thinking right there.

She wasn't old was she?

Marc Overmars
21-06-2011, 08:33 AM
Nope, she looked in her 30's. She legged it onto the train so I'm guessing she was just in a rush and needed the seat to rest. Not my problem!

LDG
21-06-2011, 08:37 AM
Fuckin bitch.

I get so agitated with those types of people I'm borderline physical with them. I'll push past someone if needs be now.

Always used to be polite to people, but I don't get any rewards for it, or any thank-you's back, so fuck 'em. Biggest bloke first I reckon.

Letters
21-06-2011, 08:37 AM
We had a real 'care in the community' on the train this morning.
Being Londoners we all buried ourselves in our papers and/or stared intently at anything but him :unsure:

Feeling chirpier today ##

Letters
21-06-2011, 08:38 AM
Always used to be polite to people, but I don't get any rewards for it, or any thank-you's back, so fuck 'em. Biggest bloke first I reckon.

By that reasoning Maori would be ruler of the universe

Flavs
21-06-2011, 08:47 AM
So on my way to work this morning on a crowded tube as usual. I was sitting down and some woman asked if she could sit. She wasn't preggers nor did she have any obvious disability, I said sorry I've still got another 10 mins or so before my stop. Then she sneered and quite blatantly spoke to someone in disgust about a lack of respect these days. I asked if she had something to say to me but she just ignored. Fuck off bint!

I will give you some advice here son, in fact 3 bits. This is from my life experience and all round knowlege of people and their behaviour.

1. If this happens you should move, its the gentlemanly thing to do and ladies do come first (stop it)
2. If you are in a bad bood or she is slightly rude or ugly then just be the beter person and let her have your seat.
3. If you really are sulky, on the rag, hungover and dont want to move, answer the question "can i have your seat" by simply patting your lap with your hands, arch an eyebrow and say "you can sit on this special seat sweetheart"

You're welcome.

PGFC
21-06-2011, 08:50 AM
So on my way to work this morning on a crowded tube as usual. I was sitting down and some woman asked if she could sit. She wasn't preggers nor did she have any obvious disability, I said sorry I've still got another 10 mins or so before my stop. Then she sneered and quite blatantly spoke to someone in disgust about a lack of respect these days. I asked if she had something to say to me but she just ignored. Fuck off bint!

Nice :good:

Marc Overmars
21-06-2011, 08:53 AM
I will give you some advice here son, in fact 3 bits. This is from my life experience and all round knowlege of people and their behaviour.

1. If this happens you should move, its the gentlemanly thing to do and ladies do come first (stop it)
2. If you are in a bad bood or she is slightly rude or ugly then just be the beter person and let her have your seat.
3. If you really are sulky, on the rag, hungover and dont want to move, answer the question "can i have your seat" by simply patting your lap with your hands, arch an eyebrow and say "you can sit on this special seat sweetheart"

You're welcome.

Thanks dad..

LDG
21-06-2011, 10:20 AM
Loving the new "Spastics Denied Registration" Stat.

Letters
21-06-2011, 10:36 AM
We were getting loads, was getting silly so Jofnn added some doobry. Then I fiddled with the doobry a bit when some were still getting through.
Seems to have done the job.

Doobrys :bow:

LDG
21-06-2011, 10:41 AM
How do you know they're a spastic though??

Letters
21-06-2011, 11:04 AM
It checks against a database of known spastics.

LDG
21-06-2011, 11:18 AM
Spazbook :bow:

Master Splinter
21-06-2011, 01:36 PM
Spazbook :bow:

Almost as good as the Freak Book


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j0MVeZStvOQ&feature=related

dazthegooner
21-06-2011, 03:55 PM
Another hour to go and I have nothing to do :(

LDG
21-06-2011, 04:00 PM
Another hour to go and I have nothing to do :(

www.goonersweb.co.uk (http://www.goonersweb.co.uk)

:good:

Letters
21-06-2011, 04:00 PM
If only you had internet access.

dazthegooner
21-06-2011, 08:57 PM
If only you had internet access.

:) Yeah I know but only been there 7 days and the managing director sits behind me though been told he doesnt mind as long as the works done when it presents itself.

Xhaka Can’t
21-06-2011, 08:58 PM
How is the job so far?

dazthegooner
21-06-2011, 09:05 PM
Yeah not too bad person thats training me is suprised how quickly I'm picking it up will probably be on the phones next week.

Coney
21-06-2011, 10:21 PM
We were getting loads, was getting silly so Jofnn added some doobry. Then I fiddled with the doobry a bit when some were still getting through.
Seems to have done the job.

Doobrys :bow:

Doobrys are for losers. Widgets ftw. :good:

Coney
21-06-2011, 10:23 PM
So on my way to work this morning on a crowded tube as usual. I was sitting down and some woman asked if she could sit. She wasn't preggers nor did she have any obvious disability, I said sorry I've still got another 10 mins or so before my stop. Then she sneered and quite blatantly spoke to someone in disgust about a lack of respect these days. I asked if she had something to say to me but she just ignored. Fuck off bint!

She's no right to ask for the seat anyway - it's yours to offer. I believe in equality - let the bitch stand. Unless giving up the seat means a chance to score, of course.

Japan Shaking All Over
22-06-2011, 07:16 AM
So on my way to work this morning on a crowded tube as usual. I was sitting down and some woman asked if she could sit. She wasn't preggers nor did she have any obvious disability, I said sorry I've still got another 10 mins or so before my stop. Then she sneered and quite blatantly spoke to someone in disgust about a lack of respect these days. I asked if she had something to say to me but she just ignored. Fuck off bint!

shit! what the hell!
Was in the pub the other day and ordered a pint, when I went to sit down I noticed there was a large crack going all the way down the glass
I went back to the barman and pointed it out to him and asked if he could change the glass

he replied 'Why don't you smile?, unless you want me to smack you in the mouth'

sorry but my ability to read between the lines has been on the wane since being over here for so long........was I missing something? because my only response was to throw the glass at his head and to end up being detained by the police

Injury Time
22-06-2011, 07:26 AM
shit! what the hell!
Was in the pub the other day and ordered a pint, when I went to sit down I noticed there was a large crack going all the way down the glass
I went back to the barman and pointed it out to him and asked if he could change the glass

he replied 'Why don't you smile?, unless you want me to smack you in the mouth'

sorry but my ability to read between the lines has been on the wane since being over here for so long........was I missing something? because my only response was to throw the glass at his head and to end up being detained by the police
http://www.zgeek.com/forum/gallery/files/2/4/8/2/7/tellifserious_thumb.jpg

Ollie the Optimist
22-06-2011, 07:55 AM
morning :)

Flavs
22-06-2011, 08:27 AM
[QU

Letters
22-06-2011, 08:42 AM
Going to have a sunbed,

:lol:

50

Letters
22-06-2011, 09:17 AM
You have 30 though, non? Enough for one league at least. Two was laybe ambition given how things have quietened on here.

PGFC
22-06-2011, 09:23 AM
Morning All.

Letters
22-06-2011, 09:26 AM
:tiphat:

Flavs
22-06-2011, 09:28 AM
You have 20 though, non? Enough for one league at least. Two was maybe ambition given how things have quietened on here.

i have 34 :good:

and thats without some of the usual suspects

Master Splinter
22-06-2011, 09:36 AM
What do you actually have to do in this GW Premier League thing?

Do you sign up by joining your group?

Flavs
22-06-2011, 09:57 AM
What do you actually have to do in this GW Premier League thing?

Do you sign up by joining your group?

just tell me to sign up, its like a fantasy football game based on the prem, but you play other posters on here in a league with full fixtures and only goals count, so if you have torres in you side and he scores real life, you get a goal in the game and so on

Master Splinter
22-06-2011, 10:03 AM
just tell me to sign up, its like a fantasy football game based on the prem, but you play other posters on here in a league with full fixtures and only goals count, so if you have torres in you side and he scores real life, you get a goal in the game and so on

Torres scoring :lol:

You can sign me up.

I'm winning this tbf.

Flavs
22-06-2011, 10:05 AM
Torres scoring :lol:

You can sign me up.

I'm winning this tbf.

good man, if you look in the section all the rules and the player sheets are in there. Transfer indow opens july 11th

Nozza!
22-06-2011, 10:38 AM
Oi, punchy bozo, is their a sweep? If so put me down for girl, 30 June, 6lb 12oz and named Pippa Sandra, Ariadne,Roslyn Selma Erica Bozo...Or Pippa S.A.R.S.E for short..

Japan Shaking All Over
22-06-2011, 10:54 AM
good man, if you look in the section all the rules and the player sheets are in there. Transfer indow opens july 11th

me too - sign me up

Flavs
22-06-2011, 01:07 PM
me too - sign me up

Kool and the gang, i will put you in ##

Letters
22-06-2011, 01:20 PM
:patrice:

Just got my Take That tickets.

I know. You all want to be me. :cool:

Cripps_orig
22-06-2011, 01:23 PM
:patrice:

Just got my Take That tickets.

I know. You all want to be me. :cool:
You'll be surrounded by teenage girls.

Good thinking Letters, im proud of you.

IBK
22-06-2011, 01:27 PM
You'll be surrounded by middle aged mums.

Good thinking Letters, im proud of you.

.....

Hump
22-06-2011, 01:28 PM
Didn't know you were a Pet Shop Boys fan, that can be the only reason you got those tickets.

Letters
22-06-2011, 01:28 PM
:lol: Think that's probably true Nasri! Me and 90,000 pissed MILFs.





'ang on... ##

Cripps_orig
22-06-2011, 01:28 PM
.....

Either way, he will be the only guy there bar the Take That muppets.

Cripps_orig
22-06-2011, 01:29 PM
:lol: Think that's probably true Nasri! Me and 90,000 pissed MILFs.





'ang on... ##
Dont forget to make up a Milfette story to rival Vpigs.

Make it interesting though which his wasnt

Nozza!
22-06-2011, 01:31 PM
Didn't know you were a Pet Shop Boys fan, that can be the only reason you got those tickets.

Oi, Dumpty, or because he has no musical taste...

Nozza!
22-06-2011, 01:32 PM
:lol: Think that's probably true Nasri! Me and 90,000 pissed MILFs.





'ang on... ##

Oi, mush, with your track record? You're so unlucky, even if you fell in barrel of tits you'd come out sucking your thumb...

Letters
22-06-2011, 01:36 PM
I'm going with the missus anyway.

IBK
22-06-2011, 01:40 PM
I'm going with the missus anyway.

Ménage à beaucoup??

Japan Shaking All Over
22-06-2011, 01:43 PM
:patrice:

Just got my Take That tickets.

I know. You all want to be me. :cool:

Letters. . .

first hockey

now this. . .

you gotta be doubting yourself by now

Id get myself down to confession if I was you and say a few hells Marys
can leave the closet at home now that youre OUT of it;)

Letters
22-06-2011, 01:57 PM
Take that I'll give you. How is Hockey a 'gay' sport? :lol:

Flavs
22-06-2011, 01:59 PM
Oi, punchy bozo, is their a sweep? If so put me down for girl, 30 June, 6lb 12oz and named Pippa Sandra, Ariadne,Roslyn Selma Erica Bozo...Or Pippa S.A.R.S.E for short..

aww it was a good try mate but i already know its a boy and that wont be HIS name...

Japan Shaking All Over
22-06-2011, 02:40 PM
Take that I'll give you. How is Hockey a 'gay' sport? :lol:

ummmmmmm! well! mmmmmmm :unsure:

its hmmmmm gotta be:blink:


theyplayitinpublicschoolright

Letters
22-06-2011, 02:52 PM
ummmmmmm! well! mmmmmmm :unsure:

its hmmmmm gotta be:blink:


theyplayitinpublicschoolright

tbf the only person I know who plays hockey is a lesbian. So far in the closet she regularly has tea with Mr Tumnus, mind.
Actually, as I was typing that I realise it's her sister who's the closeted lesbian.
In brief: Mmm...lesbians.

Nozza!
22-06-2011, 03:11 PM
Oi, punchy, bugger, keep the date and weight and I'll plump for good Viking names of Link Edin...

Japan Shaking All Over
22-06-2011, 03:16 PM
tbf the only person I know who plays hockey is a lesbian. So far in the closet she regularly has tea with Mr Tumnus, mind.
Actually, as I was typing that I realise it's her sister who's the closeted lesbian.
In brief: Mmm...lesbians.

:judge:

dazthegooner
22-06-2011, 04:54 PM
Right now getting ready to go home laters :wave:

Injury Time
22-06-2011, 06:55 PM
tbf the only person I know who plays hockey is a lesbian. So far in the closet she regularly has tea with Mr Letters, mind.
Actually, as I was typing that I realise it's her sister who's the closeted lesbian.
In brief: Mmm...lesbians.
:whistle:

Letters
22-06-2011, 09:13 PM
I see what you've done there <_<

Marc Overmars
22-06-2011, 09:27 PM
So I was at the gym earlier, went for a swim and thought about chillaxing in the jacuzzi. I went over to the other room where it's located, then I opened the door to find a couple making sweet, sweet love in there. Fair play, tbh.

dazthegooner
22-06-2011, 09:34 PM
And you didn't think of asking for a threesome for your slience? ;)

Xhaka Can’t
22-06-2011, 09:41 PM
And you didn't think of asking for a threesome for your slience? ;)

It was two dudes.

dazthegooner
22-06-2011, 09:44 PM
It was two dudes.

Puts paid the the rumour then... ;)

And suprised you didn't feel sick.

Japan Shaking All Over
23-06-2011, 02:20 AM
stop it or you'll start Letters off again!

one Take That concert is another for anyone

Alan B'stard
23-06-2011, 07:18 AM
on that note, just flogged two spare take That Tickets for the missus at work. (No I'm not going with her, she can do that on her own time).

Nozza!
23-06-2011, 07:30 AM
Oi, geezers, 1000th reply...spunky cuntbubbles...there that's made it memorable...

Letters
23-06-2011, 08:02 AM
Morning all :tiphat:

Thursday! Which is nearly Friday. Nearly.

:dance:

Japan Shaking All Over
23-06-2011, 08:40 AM
its more nearly Friday for me than you:cheer:

but in a couple days I will be saying its more nearly Monday for me than you :banghead:

Flavs
23-06-2011, 09:26 AM
I need some sleep and i swear the next fucker who comes to me for a signoff is getting knocked the fuck out

the easter bunnie
23-06-2011, 10:37 AM
it's very naughty to smack people and if you do it and don't say sorry you'll go to aitch e double tooth picks. I sometimes smack snowy my stuffed toy dog.